#dreams

I had experienced a very short, yet rather disturbing dream last week. It woke me in the middle of the night so I knew I needed to remember the dream. I replayed each deranged and confusing scene in my mind until I knew I would remember it the next day. Because of the strange and disturbing nature of my dream, I wanted my therapist to help me unravel its hidden metaphorical meaning. Here is the dream, and the conclusion we came to.

The Dream:

I was in my parents basement. I used to live in this part of their home when I was young. It isn’t the damp, unfinished type of basement. The floors are carpeted, walls painted and there are small, half windows towards the top of the ceilings. This particular room looked identical in the dream as it does in real life. The only comparable difference with the room in my dream was this lonely mini-refrigerator against one of the walls. There was nothing else in the room except for this plugged-in appliance.

As I started to walk towards the mini-fridge, I noticed I was not alone. I was being trailed by an old friend of mine that I used to do drugs with, before my addiction took a firm hold. In real life, this friend had gotten sober but later died from an aggressive type of brain cancer.

As we approached the fridge, I told him “don’t worry, I have one for you.” I was assuming he was asking me for drugs or I at least thought he was wanting drugs.

I knelt down on a knee and opened the door on the mini-fridge. I reached in the fridge and pulled out a neatly wrapped tampon. I handed my friend the tampon. He then carefully peeled the wrapping off the tampon but there was no tampon in the wrapper. It was a syringe. He pulled the plunger back on the needle until the black rubber grommet came out of the clear cylinder. “POP!”

He then put the plunger into his mouth like it was a thermometer, or a sucker stick.

This was the end of the dream…

Breakdown:

Possible meanings:

Parents’ basement – Unresolved issues; deep, dark secrets.

Old friend (now deceased) – A quality of the friend that stands out most in myself. Not necessarily about the friend himself.

Tampon – A tampon is a solution to a problem.

Taking something out of a fridge – Is a continuation of a situation(s).

Syringe – Influence/drugs.

Syringe in the mouth – Drugs as a solution.

Analysis:

My friend putting a tampon/syringe into his mouth in my parents’ basement represents either a latent or former desire to turn to drugs as a solution to my childhood/familial issues. The issues remain, therefore the desire remains. It suggests that if the unresolved issues remain unresolved, I may be at risk of relapse. This dream may have been a warning from my subconscious brain.

Disclaimer:

Dream analysis is not science. It’s not proof of anything. It could be complete nonsense. I am fully aware of this. However, I have found this extremely helpful and absolutely mind blowing. I also believe there is utility in analyzing the complex and complicated world that is our subconscious mind.

Have any of you analyzed one of your dreams?

Thank you all for taking the time to read about my strange tampon dream. 🙂

photo courtesy of creepypasta.wikia.com

Last night I had a nightmare. My neck and chest was soaking wet and beads of sweat were running down my forehead. My upper body was ice-cold from being outside the blanket and the sheets underneath me were damp and cold. I woke in a panic, trying to make sense of what was going on. Trying to figure out where I was. I was in my own bed of course but 45 seconds prior I was shooting up heroin with my wife in my drug dealers shabby basement apartment. Paraphernalia strewn all over the bedroom- used syringes covering the top of his rickety nightstand. A puke-green ragged blanket masquerading as a curtain but failing miserably as the sun ripped through the massive hole in the middle. Their were no lightbulbs in the ceiling fixture but that didn’t seem unusual in a place like that. The hole in the blanket allowed the sun to shine a perfect beam of light into the room that lit up a small statue of a unicorn that had huge buck teeth. Like the donkey from Shrek, only not a donkey. The statue was out-of-place and I remember looking at it going “what the f#$k? Why does my drug dealer have a buck tooth unicorn?”

My wife didn’t notice the unicorn but I could tell she was disgusted at all the paraphernalia scattered about. I wanted to get her out of there but when I turned around to walk out, the door had turned into a wall.

I was so upset and angry at myself because I knew it had to be mostly my fault that my wife was now using too. She has never even smoked weed so the fact that she was shooting heroin all the sudden meant that I had persuaded her at some point. Why would I do something so vile? I thought. This must be a bad dream.

Seeing us that way was so vile and disgusting. In a way, I am glad I had that dream. That will never be an option for us in reality and the thought of it makes me nauseous. I wanted to share my dream before I forgot what happened. Thanks for reading.