Drug Dreams and Buck teeth Unicorns

photo courtesy of creepypasta.wikia.com

photo courtesy of creepypasta.wikia.com

Last night I had a nightmare. My neck and chest was soaking wet and beads of sweat were running down my forehead. My upper body was ice-cold from being outside the blanket and the sheets underneath me were damp and cold. I woke in a panic, trying to make sense of what was going on. Trying to figure out where I was. I was in my own bed of course but 45 seconds prior I was shooting up heroin with my wife in my drug dealers shabby basement apartment. Paraphernalia strewn all over the bedroom- used syringes covering the top of his rickety nightstand. A puke-green ragged blanket masquerading as a curtain but failing miserably as the sun ripped through the massive hole in the middle. Their were no lightbulbs in the ceiling fixture but that didn’t seem unusual in a place like that. The hole in the blanket allowed the sun to shine a perfect beam of light into the room that lit up a small statue of a unicorn that had huge buck teeth. Like the donkey from Shrek, only not a donkey. The statue was out-of-place and I remember looking at it going “what the f#$k? Why does my drug dealer have a buck tooth unicorn?”

My wife didn’t notice the unicorn but I could tell she was disgusted at all the paraphernalia scattered about. I wanted to get her out of there but when I turned around to walk out, the door had turned into a wall.

I was so upset and angry at myself because I knew it had to be mostly my fault that my wife was now using too. She has never even smoked weed so the fact that she was shooting heroin all the sudden meant that I had persuaded her at some point. Why would I do something so vile? I thought. This must be a bad dream.

Seeing us that way was so vile and disgusting. In a way, I am glad I had that dream. That will never be an option for us in reality and the thought of it makes me nauseous. I wanted to share my dream before I forgot what happened. Thanks for reading.


12 thoughts on “Drug Dreams and Buck teeth Unicorns

  1. Only a fellow sober person would respond to this like I did. That buck toothed unicorn in your dealers place is hilarious, and the fact that you thought it was real? That’s too funny. And it was only a dream, happens to many of us. Don’t fret, just do whatever you do in sobriety and take it One Day At A Time. But you are right, it’s so scary. Don’t give yourself so much power over your wife’s life though, it is hard enough keeping ourselves sane. Cause I don’t know about you but my brain is warped. Thanks for the post.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Yeah its strange how real things seem in a dream- then you wake up and realize how silly it seems in reality. I don’t believe I have any control on my wife in reality but the dream made me think it was my fault….if that makes sense. lol My brain is definitely warped too. lol ๐Ÿ™‚

      Liked by 2 people

  2. You know I have no evidence to support this except that I’ve heard and found it true in my own life that when you dream about doing things you were formerly addicted to and have given up, it means you’ve turned a corner and really and truly have overcome the problem as if your mind has now fully accepted this is your new way of life. True? I dunno but it to does make some sense. ๐Ÿ™‚

    Liked by 2 people

    • Yeah, I don’t know. I’ve not heard that before but I have heard that dreams do have meaning in reality. Something about the unconscious trying to process fears that we suppress. That’s interesting though. I know there are a lot of books on dreams but I haven’t got around to reading any yet. I really need to. Thanks for reading and sharing. ๐Ÿ™‚

      Liked by 2 people

  3. I too am grateful for drinking (using) dreams…they can be a shocking reminder of what life used to be like for us, what we used to accept as normal. And it’s encouraging to know we don’t feel the same way anymore. A big hug to you, that doesn’t sound like fun.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Absolutely. It is so easy to forget what it was like. The anger, the pain, the hopelessness, worthlessness…it is all too terrible of a place to go back to. Thank you for your kindness and for taking time to read and share. ๐Ÿ™‚

      Liked by 2 people

  4. Brutal, harsh, real. As a former alcoholic, I often dream about relapsing and drinking like a crazy bastard. But then I wake up and have the same feeling as you – it’s great that I don’t do it anymore, it’s great that I’m married and happy. Why would I go back to it?

    Liked by 2 people

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s